


THE HEATHERS (RIVERDALE CROSSOVER)

by kawe_uncensored



Category: Archie Comics, Heathers (1988), Heathers: The Musical - Murphy & O'Keefe, Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Heathers Fusion, Based on Heathers, F/F, F/M, Heathers References, Heathers Spoilers, Jingle Jangle (Riverdale), M/M, Riverdale High School, The Farm (Riverdale)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-23
Updated: 2019-09-22
Packaged: 2020-10-26 11:49:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 23
Words: 11,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20741741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kawe_uncensored/pseuds/kawe_uncensored
Summary: Our story is about a town, a small town, and the people who live in the town. From a distance, it presents itself like so many other small towns all over the world; safe, decent, innocent. Get closer, though, and you start seeing the shadows underneath. The name of our town is Riverdale.For example, there are the Heathers (or rather the Vixens) who float above it all.They're solid teflon. Never bothered, never harrassed.And, unfortunately, Archie's cousin would give up anything to be like that.Post Season 1-2





	1. Chapter 1

On what should have been a normal day, Veronica Sawyer and Cheryl summoned Betty Cooper and Veronica Lodge to the locker room to pass their cheer uniforms onto them, also informing them of their resignation from the River Vixens. A very confused Veronica Lodge looked at Betty for clarification. For the first time, the blonde had no answers.  
Twenty minutes later, Vera had left a message to her uncle Fred as they arrived at Sweetwater River. Veronica Lodge, who had ditched with Archie and Betty to stop Jughead from going to Southside High was sent the same exact message from Cheryl.  
"Oh. My. God." The Lodge girl gasped, "ARCHIE! It's a text from Cheryl. 'Thanks for trying. We're going to be with Jason now.' Who is 'we'?"  
"Betty, Jug! We gotta go! I think Vera is going to do something crazy!" Jughead and Betty immediately turned their attention to Archie and the four friends trekked to Sweetwater River.   
By the time they reached the large body of water, Veronica Sawyer and Cheryl Blossom were already halfway across the frozen river.  
"CHERYL! VERONICA!" Archie yelled, "Come on, Vera, you don't have to do this!"  
Veronica Sawyer looked like she was going to speak as the ice beneath Cheryl gave way. "CHERYL!" The girl in blue wept, "SOMEBODY HELP! Cher! I..." the ice broke beneath her too. Her screams were muffled by the current sweeping her away. In that moment she saw everything, and then nothing.  
Hermione Lodge did not understand why a Blossom and the forgotten Andrews girl were soaking in her home.   
"Veronica? What is this?"  
"Mom," her daughter looked at her sympathetically, "Um... Archie's cousin had an accident and so did Cheryl."  
Vera got up, "Cher and I were just leaving, Mrs. Lodge. Sleepover, at Thornhill?"  
"My mom would never..."  
"Shut up, Cheryl!"  
"Sorry, Vera."  
"Thank you for your hospitality."  
Later than night, Heather and Heather hauled gasoline to Thornhill, helping Cheryl and Vera douse every bit of the estate in the liquid. Penelope Blossom was horrified when she saw the quartet holding a separate candelabra. Still, Penelope Blossom was adamant on getting her possessions, almost being fatally burned after calling Mary and Fred Andrews to notify them of their niece's antics.


	2. 2. JD

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AN INSIGHT INTO OUR ANTAGONIST, JD AND HER ORIGINS

Perfection.

Such a simple word for such a complex town only perfect on the surface.

Come to think of it, perfection was far too much of an unreasonable expectation for Jasmine Dean De La Cruz. In fact, his world was shattered when his abuelita had died in her sleep. Allegedly, that is. 

Unlike our female protagonist Vera, JD was convinced the world was out to get her. In fact, she saw the coinciding of her uncle's release from prison and his abuelita's death proof of that.

Jasmine didn't want to move to Riverdale or The Perfect Little Town as her annoying cousin always called it. And yet, basically stalking everyone of her new classmates relaxed her and served as a distraction. It was a getaway as she sat on the roof with her foster sister, Heather McNamara, exchanging journals.

At a quarter to three, a black car rolled up to the two story teal house. The one and only Man In Black stepped out obviously wearing all black.

The blonde tugged on the boy's sleeve. "Jasmine..."  
"What is it Heather?"  
"Who is that?"  
"Hiram Lodge." JD said, "Now can I go back to my book now?"

"How very, What the hell is Hiram Lodge doing in Westerburg, Ohio?"

JD jumped off the roof, grabbing her purse, "You coming or not?"

"Jasmine Dean. Greetings and salutations, tio. I presume we're your wards now?"  
Heather followed behind her, basically clutching onto her foster sister the whole time. She was a year younger than Jasmine and they grew up together so it was inevitable that she would grow attached.

Alice Cooper was cleaning her home for the arrival of her nephew and niece. Well, one of them was hers. The oldest was Hiram Lodge's sister's child. Alice had been best friends with the woman, Esmeralda, before she died during childbirth. Alice's relationship with Esme's child was very much like that of Veronica Sawyer and Cheryl Blossom.

"Betty if that beanie wearing cad defiled you..."

A knock sounded at the door.

"They're here!"

"Hi. I'm Betty. I'm sure you remember me from when we were kids."

Jasmine hugged her, "I do. You still got that ponytail, Classic."

"And you must be Hannah."

"Heather," The blonde corrected, "Heather MacNamara. I see I got put into a nicer home than you JD."

"Can it, Heather!"


	3. 3. SO WHO MIGHT YOU BE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> VERONICA AND JD'S FIRST ENCOUNTER AFTER FRED ANDREWS GETS SHOT IN POPS DINER

Fred Andrews' shooting rocked the town of Riverdale, especially the Southside who was now being blamed for that attack.   
Now, Jasmine Dean was sitting in an uncomfortable hospital chair beside Betty Cooper. She could feel everyone's eyes on her. They obviously all knew each other so she was the outsider. A curly haired girl stared at him intensely.   
"Greetings and salutations?" She spoke, "You a Northsider?"

The gum the girl was chewing popped, "None of your business."

JD chuckled, "You could say that. Or you could answer my question."  
A redhead cleared his throat, "Seriously, Vera?"  
"What, Archie? You seem perfectly fine with Betty and Jughead making googly eyes at each other."

"My dad just got shot and you don't care. He's taken care of you all your life for crying out loud. If your parents."

"Don't talk about my mom and dad, Archie." Vera snapped, "It's not the same thing. So don't even try."

As Vera got up and left, Cheryl Blossom caught her arm, "VERONICA SAWYER! I'm so glad you're alright!" She hugged her, "My sincerest apologies for our horrid sleepover last night."

"What happened?" Betty asked.

"Oh," Cheryl exclaimed coyly, "There was a fire at Thornhill, mummy ran back in to rescue Veronica and I. And I'm sorry about your dad Archie. He's a good man."


	4. 4. AH, HEATHER AND HEATHER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> MEET THE HEATHERS... AND CHERYL BLOSSOM RISES FROM THE ASHES OF THORNHILL

Chapter One

Riverdale High was full of eccentric people. The most elite of the eccentric people were waitressing at an event to keep Pop's Diner opened tonight. Veronica Sawyer sat in a booth, avoiding The Heathers. They'd had made her life a living hell since high school and she was sick of it. Her best friend Cheryl, the only one with a higher social status than Heather was currently singing with Josie and the Pussycats. Veronica had anxiety and it was expressing itself in angry diary entries after hanging out with Heather and her minions.

The bell to Pop's rang and Archie Andrews arrived with a gitl that had to be new. The new kid was looking at her with her chocolate eyes. The blue haired girl was shook to her core. As she was gathering her things to leave her worst nightmare happened.

"VERONICA! Did you get my order?" Heather.

"Goddamnit Heather." Veronica said.

"What was that?" Heather asked looking at her menacingly.

"Sorry Heather, I'll go get it right now. Cheese or no cheese?"

"Cheeseburger! Obvi!" Heather snapped from their booth.

Pop Tate nodded at her and the girl turned to see Heather heading to the bathroom.

"Greetings." the raven haired boy from earlier approached her.

"No," the girl blushed, "Uh. Hi."

"Hello. Jason Dean. Call me JD" she smiled at her, "Why don't you come sit with me and my friends?"

"Um. Heather is my best friend." she stammered. The chubbier girl eyed her suspiciously, "Friends don't scream at each other like I just witnessed.

"Well, I don't really like my friends," Veronica snapped.

"I don't like your friends either," JD laughed, grabbing her hand. She'd never really had a real friend before. The Heathers let her be invincible but was it worth it when a handsome girl was standing in front of her extending and olive branch?

The bell chimed again and Veronica turned seeing her parents with their colleagues Hiram and Hermione Lodge. Diana and Marcus Sawyer were socialites. All of their money was inherited from their parents, Veronica's grandparents. Her parents adored her but they were ignorant. They'd just come home after abandoning her for a year. Luckily, Fred and Mary Andrews still had custody over her.

"Vera!" Her mother called, "I told you we'd make it."

"Color me stoked." Veronica said, "Heather and I were actually..."

"VERONICA!" Heather jeered, less menacingly, "Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Sawyer."

"Oh hello Heather," Mrs. Sawyer said.

"It's time for the evening poll." Heather said, shoving a clipboard in my hand.

"What's the question?" Heather Duke asked.

"God, Heather, you were with me at cheer practice when I thought of it!"

So, Veronica Sawyer went around the damn restaurant asking everyone the question, "If you got one million dollars but the world ended tomorrow what would you do?"

When she got to her parents and the Lodges table, Heather pulled her away, "God, Veronica. We don't ask adults our stupid questions."

Veronica forced a smile as she headed over to the next table where five people sat. She recognized them as her old friends, minus the one she hated the most Veronica Lodge.

"Vera!" the girl squealed, "Come sit with us! How are you liking the Pop's event. Daddy just got here and he said-"

"Jesus, Veronica. Way to scare off a girl. Jason Dean. I saw you earlier. Are you a Heather?" she extended her hand.

"No. I'm a Veronica. Sawyer actually."

"VERONICA! HURRY UP!" Heather Chandler screamed.

"Well, I have to ask you guys a stupid question."

"There are no stupid questions, right Archie?" JD referred to the redhead.

"Yeah," Archie agreed, "Shoot."

"You win one million dollars but the next day aliens arrive to blow up the earth. What do you do?"

JD smirked, "Well, that's the stupidest goddamn question I've ever heard but I'd steal a yacht, bring some tequila and a cool girl, with blue hair."

"You don't even know me." Veronica Sawyer said, "Nobody knows who I am."

"I know your type." JD smirked.

Heather came over, "Veronica. Let's go."

"Bye..."

"Wait," Betty Cooper said, "Join us at lunch tomorrow."

"She can't." Heather interjected, "We have plans. Sorry."


	5. 5. LET'S MAKE HER BEAUTIFUL

Archie's phone buzzed, "Ugh, Ro, your ride is here."

"Ride where?"

"Cherry Bombshell got me a one way ticket to Westurburg, Ohio." Ro informed the group, "And Uncle Fred told me I'd be leaving this morning. And then..."

"He got shot." Archie shed another tear, "and here we are still eating at Pop's"

Westerburg High   
Three Months Later...

Martha Dunnstock bumped into Ro Sawyer on the way to the cafeteria, spilling her lunch tray all over the girl in dressed in all blue. "Jesus, fuck!"  
Martha stammered, "I'm so sorry!"

"It's fine. I'm Veronica. Sawyer-Andrews."

"Martha. Dunnstock. I'm new here, actually..."

"Martha Dumptruck, in the flesh!" A girl in all green taunted.

"Look who's with her! OMG! Veronica Andrews!"

"Heather and Heather. What are you doing here?"

"It wasn't us, actually, Southside High got closed down and there's already tension between the Serpents and the Bulldogs. Cheryl was hoping you would help us..."

"Shut up, Heather!" Heather Duke was cut off.

"Sorry, Heather. Anyways, you're coming back to Riverdale tonight. No one knows. Just you, me, Heather, and Cherry Bombshell. Oh and this is our latest addition, Heather MacNamara."

"With The right amount of effort, this could be beautiful." The newest Heather beamed.

"And you know this could be beautiful, mascara, maybe some lip gloss, and a purple wig?" The Heathers and Cheryl Blossom had successfully convinced Ro Sawyer to come back to Riverdale.

———————

"Cousin Cheryl."   
"What do you want Cousin Betty?" Cheryl Blossom scoffed, "I already lied under oath for you."

Betty hummed, "See, you lied for Jughead and now I need you to do something for me. It involves Veronica"

Ugh. Cheryl despised the Lodge girl.

"No."

"Veronica Sawyer." Betty said, "With the Black Hood going after Archie, we know he'll target her eventually so we need her to be able to stay here, safe. I know Veronica is my best friend and she hates her but..."

Cheryl popped her lips, "Say no more, cousin! Since Vera is a mutual BFF of your group and mine so I'll see what we can do... HEATHER!"

"No. The Heathers don't answer to you." Heather Chandler barked.

"I need you to take Vera under your wing."

Heather MacNamara's ears perked up, "Ooh, fun! Can I..."

"SHUT UP HEATHER!"

[•]  
"Shut up Heather! And Heather I need your brush!" Heather Chandler grabbed the tool out of Heather Duke's purse.

"Let's make her beautiful." Cheryl Blossom smirked at her best friend, "Okay?"

"Okay!"


	6. 6. VERONICA?!

IN THE SEVEN DAYS Veronica Sawyer had been officially "in" with the Heathers, JD kept hearing about her despite the Heathers guarding her at all time. Jasmine Dean and Jughead Jones had become very close since he moved to Riverdale. She'd gone with Jughead to visit FP and even convinced Hiram to let her go to school at Southside High. Although, her mother was still in the back of her mind.

Shattered.

Jasmine Dean's new life was shattered as soon as she got to SOuthside High that morning.

Fellow serpentsburst through the doors, cheering and whooping with .

"Why so happy?" she asked, "You guys jump a ghoulie?"

Sweet Pea cheered louder, "This hellhole is officially closed. We're all being transferred."

"Something about a chemical leak." Fangs said, cheerily.

"Where are you going?" Jughead asked.

"Same as you guys..." Sweet Pea said, "Riverdale High

"See that girl?" Sweet Pea said, "."

JD was practically foaming at the mouth. Veronica nodded knowingly.

"JD. You take your meds today?" Jughead Jones approached her.

JD shot him a glare, "Yeah, Jug. I'm just a little distraught about this change. Why now? And I haven't even met Hiram yet."

"Your cousin is going to love you." Jughead said, "Especially since you dress like a vogue model. You'll be her favorite person in seconds..." the beanie wearing boy winked.

"Gross, Jones! That's my cousin!"

———

"Archiekins, who's that with Heather?" Veronica Lodge didn't know Cheryl and her Heathers knew the Serpents. Regardless she put on her signature fake smile as hey walked down the stairs with Cheryl leading them.   
"Welcometo Riverdale high! On behalf of the student body, we have your schedules, locker assignments, and... Heathers! So if you'll- VERONICA?!"

"Woah." Archie said, "That's Heather DeMartino, Heather Chandler, Heather MacNamara, and..."

"Veronica?" Archie gasped, having just entered the diner

"Yeah, and? What can I do for you on this beautiful fricken day, dear friends? Still with wannabe me, I see."

Veronica said, "Excuse you?"

Veronica Sawyer stepped up to Veronica and grabbed her hair. In it was a red ribbon with a pearl. She yanked it from her hair.

"Ronnie, my love. There's a new sheriff in town."


	7. CAST

THE HEATHERS

*-*

"And there's your final bell.

It's one more dance and then farewell.

Cheek to cheek in hell with a dead girl walking!"

*~*

"We can start and finish wars.

We're what killed the dinosaurs.

We're the asteroid that's overdue."

Synopsis   
Synopsis

From Lab Partners to Partners in Crime

Vera Sawyer just wanted to be beautiful no matter what the cost was. So you can imagine how ecstatic she was when Cheryl Blossom gets her in with the Heathers.

-.-

Queen Bee Heather, Heather, and Heather practically run Riverdale High. When class president and HBIC Cheryl Blossom orders them to induct Veronica Sawyer into their group, they make her beautiful. However, what will happen when she realizes being beautiful on the outside makes you a bitch on the inside? Let's just say killing off the queen bee was supposed to be Plan B. And getting a new girlfriend was not part of the plan at all. Especially when she just so happens to be related to a certain mob boss.

Cast  
Barbie Ferreira as Jasmine "JD" Dean De La Cruz  
"Greetings and salutations. You a Vixen?"  
"Our love is god. Let's go get a milkshake."

Amandla Stenberg as VerAnica "Vera" Sawyer"Dear Diary, My Teen Angst Bullshit has a body count!"   
Amandla Stenberg as VerAnica "Vera" Sawyer  
"Dear Diary, My Teen Angst Bullshit has a body count!"

Amandla Stenberg as VerAnica "Vera" Sawyer"Dear Diary, My Teen Angst Bullshit has a body count!"   
Madelaine Petsch as Cheryl Blossom  
"I need girls with fire on my squad!"

"Just make her beautiful! That's all I'm saying!"

"You're love may be god but Toni and I are sensational."

Vanessa Morgan as Toni Topaz  
"Awe, look... The northsider's going to whine, whine, whine all night."

Leighton Meester as Heather Duke DeMartino  
"Your ass is off the team! Go on and bitch and moan!"  
Molly Tarlov as Heather Chandler-Blossom  
"Fuck me gently with a chainsaw! Betty Cooper's literally Mother Theresa."  
"CORN NUTS!!!"  
Zendaya as Heather James-MacNamara  
"Jesus! All my fucking rides to school are dead!

"My name's Heather. I live alone. My parents left. I was forced to grow."

"Hey! That's Heather's hoodie!"

Cole Sprouse as Jughead Jones"Oh great, it's the Heathers   
Cole Sprouse as Jughead Jones  
"Oh great, it's the Heathers. I'm out."  
"They say we're numb inside and I disagree."  
Lili Reinhart as Betty Cooper  
"Vera, you can talk to me. Best friends since second grade, remember?"

"I will fight for you but would you fight for me?"  
Camila Mendes as Veronica Lodge  
"Daddy, why is Heather Chandler in our house?"  
"Heather, my love, there's a new sheriff in town."  
KJ Apa as Archie Andrews  
"Stay the hell away from JD, Vera. Jughead will kill me if he finds out I let you go along with one of his psychotic plans."

"What the hell does 'our love is god' even mean anyway?"  
Luke Perry as Fred Andrews  
"I know I'm not your parent, Veronica, but I wish they'd stayed around a little longer to see the wonderful young lady you've become."

"Whatever you decide, we'll make it beautiful."  
Mark Consuelos as Hiram Lodge  
"Mija, Who is VerAnica Sawyer?"  
"Uncle, I almost forgot to introduce you to my guest."  
Madchen Amick as Alice Cooper  
"How very... VerAnica Sawyer on my doorstep to corrupt my Betty."


	8. 7. GREETINGS AND SALUTATIONS (YET, AGAIN)

VERONICA SAWYER SAT BESIDE Jughead Jones and the Serpents in the student lounge, despite the betrayed look on Betty Cooper's face. Across from her was a Southside girl wearing a Gucci watch, acid wash jeans with a black trenchcoat over an AC/DC shirt whom she recognized. Her gaze burned into Vera for a good three minutes before she finally spoke, "GREETINGS AND SALUTATIONS, you a vixen?"

"No, I'm a Veronica. Sawyer." The purple haired girl smiled, "I didn't catch your name."

JD chuckled, "I didn't throw it."

Jughead hit her shoulder, "Dude. It's twelve fifteen."

"Shit. I guess I gotta go. Pleasure to meet you Veronica Sawyer."

"You too, Miss No-Name Kid. So when might—."

Her question was interrupted by Principal Weatherbee screeching at the Serpents which also meant Veronica by proxy.

"Which one of you did this!" He shouted. Beside him, Reggie Mantle smirked widely. Veronica Sawyer wanted to punch him in the face but she stood her ground by Jughead.

"That's it. No serpent jackets. And your hair needs to be dyed back to its natural color Miss Sawyer. If I see a tattoo you will be suspended indefinitely."

"Bullshit!" Veronica Sawyer said, "I'm not a damn southsider and I'll be damned if my hair color is claimed to be gang attire! Take it up with Fred Andrews if you really want to fight about it."

"I see," Weatherbee looked to the floor, "Everyone get back to class. Now!"

________________________

Two days later, Jughead had foolishly convinced Veronica to come in her purple Serpent jacket.

"Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast, Sawyer!" Heather Chandler screeched as she watched the couple enter the student lounge, pulling her friend aside.

"Shut up, Heather!" Veronica flipped her off turning and coming face to face with Reggie Mantle.

"Take it off," He demanded.

"Fuck off." the girl barked back.

Jughead leaned back against the vending machine across the room, laughing at the pair. The fact that no one had questioned his attire yet amused him.

"Take it off, rat boy!" Reggie barked at him, seconds later.

Veronica scoffed, "I don't think you know this but this jacket was my mother's so no, I will not take it off. And also, I don't think you know what Jughead's jacket truly means to him."

"Don't bother explaining to to him, Sawyer," Jughead jeered, "He clearly has no sense of loyalty whatsoever."

"That's it!" Reggie charged at Jughead as Sawyer stood by filming the whole situation. She decided it would be good proof for their inevitable interrogation later. What she didn't expect was JD to step in and pull a gun on Reggie.

"Holy shit! Holy shit! Holy shit!" The Heathers singsonged.

"JD!" Jughead screamed, "WHat the hell!"

No one saw his gun but Reggie, Jughead, and Veronica Sawyer. And Jughead and Vera weren't snitches.

________________________


	9. 8. MYTHIC BITCH

Veronica Sawyer's POV  
"No. I'm not going down he goddamn stairs to apologize to that carbon copy of Heather Duke!"

My parents and godfather, Fred Andrews were livid with me once Hermione Lodge called him about how I "harassed" her daughter  
My parents and godfather, Fred Andrews were livid with me once Hermione Lodge called him about how I "harassed" her daughter. A week later, it was me who needed to be downstairs at his business meeting to apologize and help as punishment.

"Come downstairs or I'll make you sleepover at Veronica's!"

"Ugh, Fine."  
——————

"——————  
"Mr. and Mrs. Lodge, Mayor McCoy, Sheriff Keller. Good evening. Veronica..."

"Hi, Veroni-..." Veronica tried

"It's just Vera, actually."  
"Veronica Azul Sawyer!" My Mom shrieked.  
"Sawyer!" Uncle Fred said.

"My apologies for my outburst at school last week. It was very rude. I hope you can forgive me."

Veronica looked at me and smiled, "Of course! I would love for you to help out with Pickens Day!"

I forced a smile, "I'm not going to that celebration of ruining the Southside. And neither is Jughead."

"But..."

"Veronica Lodge, I'm not interested. I gotta go. I'm uh expected to be at Cheryl's."

Hiram cleared his throat, "We had a deal Fred. She isn't going through with it. She needs to join our partnership."

"I'm sorry." I said, "I'm not signing anything or doing anything I don't feel comfortable with, right Fred?"

Fred nodded, "Yes. Vera is still in my custody and I don't think..."  
"But she's my daughter, Fred." My mother said.   
I groaned in frustration, "While you discuss glorifying a monster and a killer, I'm going out and away from my mother."

"Sawyer!" Veronica whispered in my ear, "Archie tells me things about you. Cheryl lost her reign and I got it. Tomorrow, if you don't sincerely apologize to me and my parents... I will ruin you. Never cross a Lodge!"

The door opened and Archie came in, "Vera? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I'm um going over to Jughead's tonight! Don't wait up, I might be there the whole week."

Archie looked at the table and back at me.

"Look, maybe we can sort this all out. And then we can join you guys?" Archie said.

"Actually, I gotta go." Hiram said, bumping into Archie, "Excuse me Archie. Think about what I told you Veronica Sawyer."

I rolled her eyes, "Think about leaving me the hell alone, Mr. Lodge."

"So dismissive. Like your parents."

I grabbed my bag and left, "Archie. You know where to find me tomorrow. Six o clock. I'll meet you at our walking place."

"Okay. As long as you actually come to school." Fred said.

"Oh, I'll be there." I smirked, "I'll fucking be there."


	10. 9. YO, GIRL

As Heather MacNamara exited the girls' locker room with the Vixens after her first cheer practice of the second semester, her phone rang. She didn't mind it since Cheryl, Heather Duke and Heather Chandler were ranting about some stupid mistake Veronica and Betty made during practice.

"And then those troglodytes..." Cheryl was saying.

"Hello?" Heather answered, "God, Hiram Lodge, what in god's name do you want from me?"

"I need you at the Pembrooke now. My daughter said you witnessed what happened this morning at the high school."

"Ugh! How the hell did you get my number? I can't my parents are..."

"Your parents died two years ago, Miss MacNamara."

"Fair enough. I'll-"

Heather Chandler poked her, "We have to get back at Betty for making me look like a complete bitch at practice today?"

"Perhaps we could forge an article for the Blue and Gold via Veronica Sawyer. What do you think, Heather." Duke said aloud, "Ugh. Look at your cousin, Chandler, she's probably dreaming about Mantle the Magnificent again, huh Heather."

"SHUT UP, CHERYL!" Heather MacNamara barked, "Some of us have actual lives that we need to..."

Heather Chandler grabbed her arm, "Heather, keep talking and you can sleep on the streets for all I care. I don't think your mom would want you to."

"Yeah," Heather said, defeated, "I'm uh sorry, Heather. It won't happen again."

"I know Heather."

"You can stay with me, Heather." Cheryl whispered, "Mumsy is still recovering."  
Little did they know, Hiram Lodge heard that whole exchange.

____________________________

"Ah, Miss MacNamara."

"Guess again." Archie Andrews stood in Hiram Lodge's study, "I told the doorman I was here to see Veronica."

"I'll have to speak to Andre about that..."

"Hey, sorry I'm late... I..." Heather barged in, "Archie Andrews, shouldn't you be checking on your cousin? Cheryl's been trying to reach her since your run in last night."

"Shut up, MacNamara."

"Nice try, Andrews. I never have to do anything you say."

Archie sighed, "Why don't you like me Mr. Lodge? What did I ever do to you?"

Heather suddenly understood what was going on. Archie Andrews was one of her friends by extension of Veronica Sawyer. She always stood by her.

"Yeah, what did he ever do to you?"

"Are you both really asking me? Especially after I invited you into my house, Miss MacNamara?"

"Yeah." Archie answered, "We are."

"Your father slept with another man's wife." Hiram spat at Archie. Heather scoffed, "Seriously? You think Archie's like that? You think I would let him do that?"

"He's still not good enough for my daughter." Hiram said.

"He took care of her while you were in prison."

"And Mrs. Lodge. I was there for both of them." Archie said, "I protected your daughter."

"You'd say that to me in my own house?"

"I-"

"Heather." Jasmine Dean sauntered in, "Is there a problem here, tio?"

Heather looked the chubby firl up and down, "I'm um going to go before Heather throws me out... I mean, before she throws a fit. Bye Arch. Don't tell Heather I was here okay?"

"MacNamara..."

"Andrews. I'm serious, man. I'll see you at tryouts tomorrow which you need to swear on your life you won't tell anyone I actually showed up to. Vera's going but that's it."

"I promise." Archie said.

"Thanks, Andrews."

"Anytime, MacNamara."

"What the hell is going on here!" Veronica Lodge yelled.

"I was just leaving, I swear." The frightened Heather said, brushing past her.


	11. 9. REAL LIFE SUCKS LOSERS DRY

"Have you lost your mind, Heather!" Heather Chandler barked as the trio strutted down the hallway. As usual, the Chandler girl was chewing out Duke for trying to have an ounce of originality. Heather Chandler was uncharacteristically quiet as she stared on, clutching her books, "God! It's like you and Veronica Sawyer are trying to ruin everything! Speaking of, go get her."

Dear Diary,

Cheryl Blossom is a tyrant. If only I had more friends like that Serpent, JD. He can fight, he's got a very large vocabulary unlike our hottest jock, Reggie Mantle. But Cheryl says I should know from my life experiences how much real life sucks losers dry and-

"Ow!"

"Veronica! Get up." Heather Duke sneered, "Heather wants to talk to you now!"

"Tell her I'm busy."

"Wow, you're part of Sad Breakfast Club now?" Heather Chandler entered, Heather MacNamara in tow, "I thought we agreed Archie was annoying as hell."

"Hey!" the redhead boy gasped, obviously offended.

Veronica rolled her eyes, "What do you need, Heather?"

"I need a note from Weatherbee giving me permission to make out with Reggie under the bleachers during history class. Something like... 'Miss CHandler has contracted mono and needs to rest her lips on something soft.' or..."

"No." Veronica said, "I'm not forging a doctor's note for you. Screw that. Maybe you can piss me off enough for me to pay Cheryl to break your leg." The purple haired girl threw her pen at Heather.

"Okay then." Heather said, "Write me a note to Betty from Mr. Emo over there with the snakes." Sawyer hesitated, meeting JD's eyes. Damn, she was fucking beautiful. And for once, a person was looking at her with interest instead of Cheryl or the Heathers, god forbid.

The feeling was so euphoric that in the trans she found herself scribbling the note and hand it to Jughead herself. Jason Dean had that disappointed look in her eyes as she looked at her.

"You shouldn't have bowed down to the Insta-Thots as diet coke heads." Her suave voice nearly made her fall over in the middle of the hallway. She raised an eyebrow. JD nodded affirmatively. "Well, you're planning your future, Veronica Sawyer. And sometimes we all have to escape with a maple snow cone on stolen tribal land."

Shit. Jughead's fucking article! She hadn't seen it but Heather blabbed about it for hours on the phone last night.

"Are you asking me to go to Pickens Day with you?"

"Do you want me to ask you to go to Pickens Day with me?"

"Shut up and buy me a snowcone tomorrow. JD Lodge."

"How did you..?"

"Heather MacNamara and I tell each other everything. I keep it from Chandler as long as she's 100% honest."

"Very well then. I'll see you tomorrow Veronica."

"Sawyer, actually."

"You sure, cuz your full name has more of a ring to it."

"I-"

Betty Cooper and Jughead screaming her name ended the conversation as the mystery girl slipped away into the crowded halls.


	12. 11. WHO NEEDS COCAINE (JUST FREEZE YOUR BRAIN)

"Juggie. Betty. I see you got my  
notes. I can explain."

Jughead's veins were pulsing from his head, "Toni is already pissed at me even after I apologized to her uncle so why the hell would you send me a forged note from both her and Betty?"

"IT WAS HEATHER's idea!"

"Oh so you do whatever Cheryl's minions say now?" Jughead looked at her expecting and answer, "This isn't you, Veronica Sawyer! Whatever happened to the Veronica Sawyer that was a badass Serpent Queen in training?"

Betty nodded in agreement, "Call us when the shuttle lands."

And in her moment alone and weak, Veronica Lodge approached her with her father.

Vera quickly turned the other way and cursed under her breath. She made eye contact with Heather DeMartino who was flirting with Reggie Mantle as usual with MacNamara by her side.

"Veronica Sawyer!"

She turned around, smiling as much as possible, "Veronica Lodge. Mr. Lodge. What do I owe this pleasure? I really should be..."

"Save it," Veronica said.

"Girl I know you're not trying to stop me from expressing my first ammendement rights." Vera sassed, "You wanna talk? Call me. I have quite a busy schedule. In fact, HEATHER!"

"Yeah, Vera?" Heather MacNamara responded instantly.

"I'm going to Pickens' Day."

"But Heather and Cheryl said."

"I could care less what Cheryl says. She and I are a packaged deal. Partners. I'm going there."

"So am I."

"Whatever, Heather. I'll see you at my house for a sleepover, yeah?"

"Yes, Vera."

"Bye Heather."

"Bye Vera."

Veronica looked at the purple haired girl in shock. The girl frowned, "What? Heather literally does whatever I say. I told her to stop about twenty times but after the twenty first time it just got kinda annoying and I decided why not just be her friend, ya know? It's like... I'm going to Pickens Day because I love Riverdale not because I support SoDale."

"God, you're beautiful." Veronica said sarcastically.

"I know." Vera said, "But seriously, let's skip the pleasantries. You want something from me."

"I-"

"Just tell me what you want, straight up, Veronica. Clearly, you're obsessed with me."

"I'm not... I just wanted to know your intentions with Jasmine?"

"You mean JD?" Veronica Sawyer said, "I barely know her. She's cool I guess if that's any of your business. Focus on Archie okay? Once you're on my bad side, you're on Jughead's too. Remember that."

"Veronica-"

"It's Vera. And I gotta get home or Fred will freak."

-

JD waited for Sawyer by the snow cone cart. She'd been there for five minutes was there as she approached with Cheryl.

"Hi." She handed her the snowcone.

"How'd you know I'd like a snow cone?"

"Simple. Everybody loves a good snow cone." JD said, "It's the one thing every town I've been to has in common. Their frozen treats served in parks that I love to get lost in."

"Like drugs?"

"No. With brain freeze who needs cocaine."

"I-"

"Just try brain freeze, Veronica Sawyer. You'll still go to college and marry a lawyer. So take a risk."

Why not? Veronica Sawyer was her own person with a distinct hatred for this made up commercial holiday that was destroying the Southside.

"Fuck you, Mr. Lodge!" She threw her snowcone to the ground and guided JD to the line of protesters.

"I knew you'd come around, Sawyer." Jughead said through his muffled tape. She could feel him smiling. Toni Topaz was satisfied with her too. They hadn't seen each other since eighth grade, the two girls. Sweet Pea still couldn't stand to look at her as he actively conversed with JD. Fangs was just as excited to have her back.

And all night, Veronica Sawyer stayed with the Serpents at the Whyte Wyrm, drinking and singing and dancing their cares away. Little did they know, trouble never ends in Riverdale.


	13. 12. FREEZE YOUR BRAIN AND START WALKING

Play "Freeze Your Brain" while reading this chapter

"I don't need this, Hiram." Jasmine Dean scoffed, walking out of Veronica's confirmation, "I can't just sit back and watch ruin this town just like you ruined my mother."

"Your mother..." Hiram paused, "was an accident."

"You had them demolish the damn building the minute she went in!" JD practically screamed. He grabbed his satchel. He heard saw Jughead and Betty walking out with Veronica Sawyer.

"Where are you going?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Betty said, smirking.

"Jasmine if you walk out that door!" Hiram hissed

"I won't be back, Hiram. You can relish in that promise. And keep rolling in those child support checks."

Veronica Sawyer had nowhere to go. She couldn't stand looking at her cousin Archie since the stunt he pulled going to talk to Mr Lodge just now. Hell, she didn't want to even be at this stupid confirmation. She needed a night to herself, with people she actually appreciated. She stood by Cheryl, Heather, and Heather who were actively gossiping.

The Heather Chandler dug her nails into Heather MacNamara's wrist as she went after her only true best friend.

The words, "Screw off, Heather" echoed through the dance hall.

Everyone was staring at the trio. The blue haired heather didn't care. Even Veronica stayed watching with a stunned Betty and Jughead.

"Heather, come on. Don't do this." Veronica Lodge said.

"No." MacNamara glared at Chandler. "I'm done taking orders from her, Veronica. Get your hands off me, Chandler. Move, Heather. We're not family anymore. And I... don't feel so good." Without warning, she vomited all over Heather CHandler's dress.

"YOU STUPID BITCH!" Heather screamed, "I saved your ass from getting put into a foster home. I made you a somebody! I made you and Veronica over there. And you betray Heather and I..."

Veronica Sawyer stepped forward, "I'm really sorry, Mr. and Mrs. Lodge. Come on Heather, let's go."

"And you-" Heather Chandler pointed to her, "You don't get to be somebody ever again. You and Jesse James over there really should transfer because so far all you've done is pay me in puke!"

"Lick it up, baby." Sawyer said, "Lick. It. Up."


	14. 13. CUZ YOU'RE DEAD GIRL

"Monday morning, you're history!" Heather Chandler continued, "Transfer to Greendale or go back to Sherwood, Ohio. No bitch at Riverdale will be playing your little games."  
-  
Veronica Sawyer didn't give a fuck anymore. Heather was going to crucify her in two days and she was pretty sure Veronica Lodge and her parents would put out a witch hunt for her and MacNamara.   
Paid in puke.  
"Holy shit!"  
Lick it up, baby. Lick it up.  
"Holy shit! Holy shit! Holy shit! I can't believe I..."  
"Stalking me now, are we Veronica?" a deep female voice startled her.   
"JD? No I always come to Pop's Diner when I'm stressed." She replied, "If anything you're stalking me."  
"Well, after the fight I witnessed, may the odds be ever in your favor." JD stuck her head back into a copy of The Hunger Games and turned to walk away.  
"Excuse me! Don't just quote Effie Trinket at me and walk away!"  
JD looked back to her in a moment that made her whole world freeze. The devilish grin plastered on her face felt like pleasant sunlight. She ran up and kissed her. Jasmine kissed back and then pulled away. The blush on their cheeks said they both liked it.   
47 hours and 45 minutes  
"Shit." She whispered, "I'm dead. Pop Tate..."  
"Yes Veronica? Let me guess, you wanna know where Jasmine Dean lives?"

The girl nodded vigorously.  
"I believe she lives with the Lodges."  
As in Hiram Lodge?   
I can't like a Lodge.  
"Thank you so much."  
-  
Smash!  
"Veronica?" Jasmine Dean wasn't expecting anyone in his house at this time of day let alone a girl, "What are you doing here?  
"Ssh..." Veronica Sawyer said, "I'm sorry about Pop's. I'm sorry about Heather and how she's treating you and everyone like shit. I'm sorry about everything but I want all of you. Tonight. Every broken part of your beautiful soul."  
"What happened to Heather? She know you're here?" JD said, "She'll kill you ya know?"  
Veronica stripped off her shirt and began sucking JD's neck, "Leave that shit at the door! I here it's going to be fucking beautiful."  
The girl in the trenchcoat lit up and kissed her aggressively.   
"Touch me!"  
Her hand gripped her bare ass like it was an orange.   
"Pull my hair."   
The purple spaghetti strands came off like the skin of an orange, revealing her natural afro.  
"Touch me, there." Oh her breasts resembled apple that Jasmine just wanted to fall off the fruitful tree that was her body.   
"I LOVE YOU, Dead Girl Walking!"


	15. 14. WE CAN BE BEAUTIFUL (JUST NOT TODAY)

September 1, 2018

Dear Diary,

I believe I'm a good person. I believe that there's good in everyone but here we are sitting in a courtroom three days before the start of junior. I look around at these people I've known all my life, including my cousin Archie Andrews, and I ask myself, "How the hell did this happen?"

Archie Andrews sat at the top of the courtroom staircase, looking down at me. I don't he noticed me staring back at him nor did he think I noticed him looking straight at me. Betty Cooper made me wait with her while she took her Adderall which I personally forged her prescription for so she wouldn't get caught. That's what best friends do I guess. Coincidentally she decided to go get water when The Heathers walked down the hall. Shit. I completely forgot I was still one of their lapdogs.

The judge called a recess at ten thirty that morning and I took advantage of that. As Riverdale's very own social media queen and literal embodiment of Veronica from Heathers, I took it upon myself to keep a diary with her at all times and be as cordial as I could be. When I caught that familiar gleam of red hair running up the stairs I immediately followed and hugged him. Archie Andrews and I had a history. When Jughead got transferred to Southside High, he let me stay with him because while Mom and Dad were constantly travelling, I wouldn't be caught dead living in the Pembrooke with the Lodges while my parents weren't present even though I was tempted by my massive infatuation with their niece, Jasmine Dean.

And then there are the Heathers, still teen royalty, although less relevant than Jason and Cheryl Blossom. They float above it all.

"Move it, freak!" Heather MacNamara scoffed as she bumped in Fangs like the klutz she is.

I chuckled to myself as Heather Duke waved to Archie's false accuser, Hiram Lodge. With a huge grin on her face she said, "Looking forward to the end of this trial, Mr. Lodge. Hashtag Justice for Cassidy."

Heather Duke-DeMartino: The only girl on the football team (which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf). She has no discernable personality until you get close to her but the chances of that happening are slim to none.

"Heather... He's innocent. You don't have all the facts. I was there with-"

Heather MacNamara: She's the fourth richest girl in Riverdale. Her parents sell engagement rings. She's a sensative soul, though she seems like a ditz. And don't let the matching outfit fool you, she may not be 100% loyal to Heather Chandler.

"Shut up, Heather!" Dressed in red, Heather Chandler.

And her cousin, Heather Chandler: Class President and Junior captain of the River Vixens. Girlfriend to the late Jason Blossom. She is a mythic bitch.

They're solid teflon. Never bothered, never harrassed. And I would give up anything to be like that.

Just my luck, I bumped into Heather Chandler, who smiled at me. "Vera Sawyer. Heard you craved a boon."

"I'm sorry, Heather. I just bumped into you and I..."

"God, Veronica." The Heathers laughed, "Meet us outside the courthouse after today's trial ends. And tell Cheryl I was nicer to you."

"I-"

"The correct answer is 'thank you." You're welcome." Heather Duke cut her off.

"Shut up, Heather!"

"Sorry, Heather."

And then they vanished without another word.


	16. 15. AND YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW (LIFE CAN BE BEAUTIFUL)

Of all people, why would Cheryl send Heather to befriend me? I mean, I was her best friend and we practically grew up as sisters but she had Toni now. I swear we've talked more about if Toni loved her than my own problems. For example, my parents were acting awfully secretive at dinner the other night with the Lodges. And I saw Dilton Doiley playing some dumbass game with elf ears on.

"Heather look!" Heather Duke shouted pointing to me.

Heather MacNamara wrapped me in a hug, "I can't believe you actually came!"

"Ya know, what, girls?" Heather Chandler smirked, leaning against the courthouse wall, "This could be beautiful." The way her hands held my face felt like they were made for that purpose. "Mascara, maybe some lip gloss... And Heather give me your fucking brush."

"Let's make her beautiful!"

"Okay?"

"OKAY!"  
-

"Who's that with Heather?"

"VERONICA?" Jughead choked on his burger.

"Oh shit," Sweet Pea's tongue fell out of his mouth, "H-hey, Veronica."

"Watch it, Dude." JD slapped his arm before wrapping her own around me, "Hey, babe. Our love is god."

"Our love is god."

JD raised a glass, "To Veronica."

And in that moment, Cheryl Blossom appeared, "To Veronica Sawyer becoming beautiful again. Can't a girl get a warm welcome after a road trip with her girlfriend?"


	17. 16. POOL PARTY

Sawyer

September 2, 2018

Dear Diary,

It was junior year and my parents were forcing me to have breakfast with their business partners, The Lodges. I, Veronica Sawyer, do not consider myself a bad person. However-

"Ronica!" my mom calls from across the table. I look up from my phone, meeting her eyes. She's staring at me, intensely, "Ronica, Mr. Lodge asked you a question."

JD squeezes my hand tightly and nods in his direction.

It was bad enough they wouldn't let me live with Uncle Fred anymore and he was the one who legally had custody of me. I hate to say this but I miss being Heather Chandler's favorite.

I shut off my phone, "I'm sorry what?"  
"Miss Sawyer, where do you see yourself in five years." he asked.  
"I don't know." I spoke truthfully, "I'd love to be an actress."  
My mother laughed, "That isn't practical."  
"Neither is divorce mother," i muttered. Jazmine stifled a laugh.

"What was that, sweetheart?"  
"Nothing." I said as my phone buzzed. It was Heather, asking if I was going to the pool party tonight. Every Labor Day, Cheryl threw an epic pool party. This year it was serving as a going away party for town golden boy, Archibald Andrews.   
My phone buzzed again, and I answered it, "I'll be back." I left the table, "Hello?"

"Sis..." Jazmine said, "Tell Heather I need my brush back."  
"Sawyer! Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast! You were supposed to help me pick bikinis for the pool party!"

Yes, I'm still a Heather. It's just ever since Veronica Lodge's confirmation, I was the one Heather tormented instead of Heather Duke and it didn't matter because I had JD.

"Heather, I'm a little busy right now..." I said.  
"Shut up, Sawyer!" Heather screeched, "Bring me my cornnuts."  
"Plain or BQ?"  
"Goddamnit, you know I love BQ!"  
She hung up abruptly.  
"Well, it was lovely to see you guys again but I gotta motor." I said grabbing my purse, "Heather and I are going to Cheryl's pool party today, you know to support Archie."  
Hiram Lodge's face was angry and my mother was glaring at me.  
"Veronica Sawyer if you walk out that door!"  
"WHat mother? You'll cut me off or have me killed? Or frame me for murder like Hiram did to Archie? I could care less." I said, "Now, I'll be gone for awhile. Don't wait up."

It's times like this where I wish I stayed with Dad during the week instead of weekends.

-  
"Greetings and salutations." I noticed a tall girl in leather jacket inside the den with the Serpents. Jughead made eye contact with me and chuckled sarcastically, "I see you've finally met JD."

"Hey, stranger."   
"Are you a Heather?" she asked, tugging on my blue scrunchie, obviously flirting with me. We kissed passionately, "Our love is god."

"Our love is god." I breathed, kissing her cheek.

"No. She's a Veronica, Sawyer." Betty mocked as she hugged me, "Welcome back V-Saw."  
"Where's Heather?" I asked. Right on cue as if Jesus had called upon her to serve him, Heather Chandler entered in her half-black, half-red serpent jacket.  
"Here." she announced, "Where the hell has she been?"  
"SHe just got here." Toni defended.  
Heather looked at me, "Chill, Topaz, just making sure my best friend is on point as always."  
"Thank you Heather."  
"Now what happened?" I asked.  
"Hot Dog was taken by Ghoulies." Fangs said, "Specifically your-"  
"Ugh. I'll take care of her."  
"DId you eat another brain tumor! You'll ruin our image Veronica!" Heather yelled at me.

"You're right, Heather." MacNamara who was now like a sister to JD replied, "Veronica, we still on for movie night."

"Can I-" Heather Duke started.

"SHut up Heather." Chandler screeched, "Continue with your spiel Jones."

"Alright, so here's the plan..."

As they spoke, JD and I left wrapped hand in hand.


	18. 17. MORE OF A NO RUST BUILD UP MAN MYSELF

September 5, 2018

Dear Diary,

Killing Heather Chandler was like offing the wicked Witch of the West- East- West- Wait... Goddamnit! Whatever! The point is my secret girlfriend and I killed her. Well, the cups got mixed up. It's not like I fucking planned it! God, I'm not that clever.

Heather and her best friend Sawyer were beyond screwed. Archie Andrews had been arrested less than two days ago and Hiram Lodge had come back living to the Pembrooke, which he now owned a year ago. That explained why tonight, Heather and Sawyer were required to be present at the Lodges' apartment.

Sawyer hated Veronica Lodge with a passion.   
"So, mija." Hiram said, "How are you?"  
Sawyer looked at Heather knowingly as Veronica said, "Stop making small talk daddy."  
Heather looked at them, "If it's any consolation, Sawyer and I are doing amazing."  
"Shut up Heather!" Sawyer whispered, "If we're going to see JD tonight we need to be on our best-"  
"Veronica Sawyer!" her mother barked. The girl plastered on a fake smile as her drunk mother entered.   
"Mama! You actually came. And you're actually 50% sober. How fascinating." Sawyer said, nonchalantly gathering her purse, "Lovely meeting you but I have to get my mother home. She isn't well. Heather grab her."  
Hiram Lodge sat there speechless with his wife and daughter and Archie Andrews.  
Sawyer and Heather looked the other teens dead in the eyes and recited in unison, "If either of you say a word to anyone about what just happened we will end you."  
"Wait, nevermind." Sawyer said, "Cousin Jughead would have my head if I ever hurt you."  
Heather smiled at Veronica, "Oh and, if I hear that Archie Andrews is being harmed in that hellhole you call a juvenile detention center, Mr. Lodge. I won't hesitate to go elsewhere with my mother and her money."  
Hiram Lodge wasn't stupid. He had known Sawyer all her life and knew about her deep hatred for Veronica. However, he had made it acceptable that she and her mother continue to stay in the Pembrooke. In a way, Sawyer owed it to him to tolerate Veronica.  
As the two girls walked back to Heather's apartment, they encountered JD in the hallway.  
"Ugh. It's your stalker Veronica." Heather sneered as they reached   
-  
-

"We just killed my best friend!"

"More like your worst enemy!"

"Same difference!"

-

"Okay so, this G&G game is wild. It says we need blueberry freshaid and... CYANIDE, JD! CYANIDE!"

"Okay, okay... no need to make me burst an eardrum, Veronica." JD held her hands up in defense, "Besides, I'm more of a no rust build up man myself."

In his hand was Drain-O. The detergent with a big ass do not drink or consume label on the front. And this dude wanted to-

"Don't be dick, you'll kill her!"

"The extreme always makes an impression." JD chuckled, "Alright, Heather is coming over to play in what... ten minutes?"

"Well, to make my life a living hell is more like it but..."

"VERONICA!!! WHERE ARE MY GODDAMN CORN NUTS! I SWEAR IF YOU AND JESSIE JAMES FUCK THIS UP TOO!"

"Speak of the devil." JD said aloud, "And she shall appear

*TWO HOURS LATER*  
-  
-

PROLOGUE

November 8, 2018

10 o'clock at night

"I just killed my best friend!"

"I think you mean your worst enemy."

"Same difference!"

"We killed her." the chubbier girl said, "but what if we didn't?"

The girl glared at him, "what the hell are you talking about?"

"What if... what if it was like a suicide?" JD said, "she's even got a copy of The Fault In Our Stars. All we gotta do is..."

"Write a suicide note."

"Bingo!" the Jasmine snapped her fingers, "you can fake her handwriting right?"

"I-"

"Do you want your SAT scores to be sent to San Quentin or to your house? Cuz I could care less."

Vera stayed silent.

"How about we just call the cops?"

Our story begins on two sides of one - one where magic happens and another that had recently unearthed its darkside. On the night of Archie Andrews' arrest and false confession to the murder of Cassidy Bullock, Veronica Sawyer and her friend Jason Dean were guilty of the murder of Heather Chandler.

"We gotta call the cops." Veronica began to dial nine-one-one as her JD threw her phone at the wall.   
"No cops. You think they're going to believe that we just accidentally killed Heather?" The crazy look in JD's eyes was something Veronica Sawyer never experienced. A yelp escaped her.   
"We killed Heather, but what if we didn't?" JD began to rant, "What if she killed herself? All we need is a-"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Vera asked, "I'm not writing a suicide note, I just said..."  
"Perfect!" JD grabbed a pen and paper and shoved it in Vera's hands. Frightened of the girl she thought she knew, the girl began to write Heather's faux suicide note. Veronica felt guilty even though it wasn't her fault. It was JD's idea to play the game and she obliged. They knew Heather would do anything to-  
Her phone rang as they left the apartment thirty minutes later.  
"Hello?" the girl was petrified.  
"Veronica Sawyer?" it was a teenage girl.  
"It's just Vera and you are?"  
"Evelyn Evernever. You may have heard of the Farm." Evelyn said from the other line.  
Sawyer sighed, "Look, Evelyn. I really can't talk right now. Bye." Sawyer took out her keys and prepared to enter her apartment. "What are you doing, Vera?" JD asked.  
"Going home."   
JD grabbed her hand, "I'm sorry about tonight. If I'd known how dangerous the game was I-"  
"Jasmine Dean." Sawyer breathed, "Tonight was actually the most fun I've had in a long time."

The now partners in crime now had to worry about covering up the accidental murder of Heather Chandler as a suicide.


	19. 18. DEATH OF A MYTHIC BITCH

Hiram Lodge had caught Veronica Sawyer in bed with JD and was standing over them. "Good morning, Jasmine."  
"Awe, Jesus Christ!" JD said, "I'm trying to sleep!"  
Vera stirred, "OH MY GOD! HEATHER! JD WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?"  
"Ssh... Babe. Don't freak..."  
"But I..."  
"You-"  
"Don't talk over me, JD!" Vera snapped, "I gotta go..."  
"Where?"  
"Are you dumb?" Vera snapped, "We just got caught in bed together you idiot! And we left Heather by herself in her damn room! JD..."  
He chuckled, "JD!"  
"I'm going to kill you if you ever do that shit again." Veronica said, "Excuse me, Mr. Lodge. I'll be back when your niece stops being an asshole."  
"Wait, Veronica!"  
"I mean it JD! Call me when the shuttle lands!"  
-  
Dear World,  
I, Heather Chandler should be dead for how I treated people. I hate myself. I hate the world. But what if I could help it by leaving? That's the me inside of me.  
Shut up!  
Heather Chandler  
-  
Bzzz...  
"SAWYER! GET TO THE HOSPITAL NOW!"   
"Jughead? What's wrong?" the frantic tone in her friend's voice was terrible.  
Jughead paused, "It's Heather. Betty said she attempted suicide. We don't know if she's going to make it. And Dilton was playing this game and he's. Come as soon as-"  
Vera was very confused about the whole situation. Less than 12 hours ago, she and JD had killed Heather while playing Griffins and Gargoyles. How was it possible that Betty Cooper witnessed paramedics bringing Heather in. Unless...  
"Betts. You said Heather attempted suicide?"   
"Sawyer, my eavesdropping skills tell me there was a note on the shattered coffee table. And chalices. Did you see-"  
"No." Vera didn't miss a beat, "I dropped her off after our dinner with Hiram and Veronica, I swear Betts."


	20. 19. BIG BUD DEAN

The next morning, Mrs. Sawyer was drinking in the living room with Hermione Lodge. Sawyer had spent the night thinking about what she- and JD- did to Heather last night.   
It was an accident, right? Sawyer never heard of the game before. Hell, Sawyer had never seen JD's psycho personality before Archie's trial.   
"Morning, Sawyer."   
"Good morning-" the blue haired girl stopped in her tracks, "Mama? You're up?"  
"And you're awfully cheerful today, after Heather's-"  
"Don't. Heather is going to be fine. I'm visiting her today with Jughead and Betty. Then I'm stopping by the juvie to see Archie."  
"What about school?" Hermione interjected before Mrs. Sawyer could speak, "As mayor I can't condone truancy."  
"Really? But you can condone your own husband framing a fucking sixteen year old for murder? Mrs. Lodge, I sincerely hope you and your husband have a positive outcome planned for all of your lies. Bye mama."  
Mrs. Sawyer waved her over, "Veronica, I've instructed Jughead to have you stay over at his trailer with your dad until this whole G&G mess is sorted out."  
"Oh thank god," Sawyer was so happy.  
"But you have to intern for Hiram-"  
"Excuse me?" Vera was mad, "I don't work for mob bosses who-"  
"I take it she didn't like the offer." Hiram said behind Sawyer.  
Sawyer took her bag and bolted, "Don't wait up. I'll be gone for awhile. You'll be lucky if you ever see me again."  
The girl in blue hair ran all the way to school to meet up with Jughead and Betty right as they were making out.  
"Ew. As much as I ship Bughead, you two seriously need to not makeout at school."  
"Oh Sawyer," Betty said as we walked to class, "Don't be so dramatic. C'mon. Let's go visit Heather before."  
"Veronica Sawyer!"   
"JD what do you want with my cousin," Jughead said, "She's not your type."  
Vera blushed, "Well, Jughead. JD and I hung out the night Ben jumped out the window. JD's actually a very hilarious person."  
"Okay," Jughead nodded, "Well, stay away from Vera. JD, my dad told me about your past offences."  
JD waved, "Alright then, see you around Jones'." Then she left.  
"Well, looks like my cousin's love life is yet another unsolved mystery." Jughead laughed.  
"Fuck off, Jughead. What's your damage? Can we just go to the damn hospital to see Ben and Heather already."  
At the hospital, the trio of teens went to visit Mrs. Button.  
"Some hospital room." Sawyer said, "and yet something doesn't add up."  
Jughead looked at the door as Mrs. Button said, "You know my Ben?"  
"I knew him from the Drive in." Jughead said, "Sawyer and I lived there for awhile."  
And Betty, "Ben was in my classes."  
Then, something caught Vera's eye. "Um... who else visited Ben? Where'd this come from?"  
"Um. A nice girl who wears ribbons in her hair."  
"Ms. Cooper. Mr. Jones. Awe, and Sawyer who I have been looking for." Sheriff Minetta said.  
Sawyer grabbed her bag, "Happy to oblige Minetta."  
-  
The mayor's office was a weird place for Vera to be during a school day, especially when she saw her alcoholic mother there with Hiram Lodge.  
"For christ's sake, I was pulled out of school for this?" Vera was pissed.  
"Sit down." Mrs. Sawyer barked at her daughter, "Why weren't you at school this morning?"  
"Jug and I were in the Blue and Gold. With Betty." the girl quickly replied.  
"Veronica, then why was I told that you three left school?"  
Vera looked around, "Obviously you're delusional mother. You and your posse seriously need to-"  
She slapped her daughter.  
"Greetings and salutations, Mayor Lodge, Mr. Lodge, and Mrs. Sawyer." JD casually sat down, "My father gives his apologies for not being able to make it. He's probably still destroying Southside high like a lunatic."  
Vera stood there, "Your father?"  
"Big Bud Dean." Vera scoffed, turning to go.


	21. 20. WHAT'S YOUR DAMAGE, MOTHER?

"Big Bud Dean." Vera scoffed, turning to go. She a strong hand on hers. It was guiding her to sit down.   
"Sit. I like getting to know my uncle's employees kids." JD smiled, "Am I right, Aunt Hermione."  
"Yes. Jasmine Dean is very charismatic." Sawyer looked at Veronica with confusion. She didn't want to be there either.  
"My condolences to your friend Heather's accident. Is she okay?" JD asked. She knew good and well what happened that night, since she was there afterall.  
"Heather is still in a coma. They say it'll last a week or two. Anyhow, I'm sure Jughead would have a heart attack if he knew Veronica let you see me. So, Veronica, let's go to school."  
"But-"  
"Now. Veronica. I need your help with geometry. Fractions and whatnot. You always were the best at it-"  
"Veronica." It was JD, "I mean, Vera. My true intentions were to ask you out tonight."  
"Jasmine- my cousin's the Serpent King and you're just another Serpent. I'll be at school. And I actually have a date tonight with Reggie Mantle."  
"You do?" My mother questioned, "How'd you manage that hot guy."  
"Heather, actually set us up." It was true- not the date part. Heather was a bitch but she cared deeply for Vera, "So, JD, if some night you're free. Reggie and you could fight for me."  
JD smiled, "Better get going, Sawyer. And tell Reggie he betterr be prepared."  
My mother said, "That's the type of guy Archie Andrews wants to be."  
Veronica Lodge scoffed at my mother and said, "Then you obviously don't know anything about Archie."  
With that Veronica and Vera dashed out of the room and to the juvie.


	22. 21. DRAIN-O, MOTHER FUCKING DICK!

Archibald Andrews looked like shit. Veronica acted oblivious to it but Vera just couldn't stop thinking about it after the fact.  
When Vera visited Betty, there were a bunch of people dressed in white at her house. Betty was very upset, dragging her upstairs. Sawyer's phone started to buzz.  
"Vera." It was Hiram. She shot Betty a look.  
"What is it?"  
"Nothing, Betty. It's just my mom." Then, "What do you want?"  
"I need you to go to Leopold and Loeb and meet with the warden for your internship."  
Vera chuckled, "You're out of your mind if you ever thought I was going to do that."  
"Oh, but Miss Sawyer, I happen to know what really happened on the night of Heather's alleged attempt."  
"How did you-"  
"Security cameras."  
"Fuck, Betty. I gotta go." Sawyer said as she hung up the phone.  
"WHy?"  
"It's nothing. Just a developement in Heather's case."  
"I'll come."  
"No." she already planned to call Jughead.  
To Jug, meet me at Pop's asap, alone. we need to talk. g&g CASE... URGENT  
-  
-  
"So, let me get this straight," Jughead was on his third burger, "You, Heather, and JD played G&G thinking it was just a game and then JD came out with the chalices which you did not help prepare and you guys pois-"  
"SHE" then Vera lowered her voice, "if i had known JD'd spiked the chalices, i would have never played, Jug. And now, Hiram... no nevermind..."  
"What about hiram? is he puppetmastering you?"   
"Yes, Jug. You're my partner in crime and best friend. I don't know what I'd-"  
Bzzz...  
"Hello? Yeah this is Heather's legal guardian. Yeah... thank you so much. I'll be right there." Joyful tears sprang into Vera's eyes, causing her liquid blue eyeliner to run down her cheeks. Nonetheless, a smile remained on her face, "She's awake and she wants to see us."  
"Us?" they were walking the halls of the hospital and Jughead still couldn't wrap his head around why Heather would want to see him aswell.  
"The doctor said she requested Veronica and her Serpent King."  
"Veronica!" Heather said, "I want that bastard behind bars. I saw him."  
"You saw him what?"  
"God, Veronica, I drank the chalice so you wouldn't." Heather breathed. Jughead and Sawyer collectively gasped as Heather Chandler flatlined.

Dear Diary,  
Ding-Dong! The Mythic Bitch is Dead!


	23. 22. BLACKMAIL

During study hall, I got called to Principal Weatherbee's office. I took my bag and when I got there Hiram Lodge was there, "What is this?"  
"For your community service credits. You will be helping out Mr. Lodge during study hall." Principal Weatherbee explained.   
Jughead had apparently been following me, "Mr. Jones."  
"Principal Weatherbee." He said, "And Hiram Lodge, Cousin."  
"I'll call you later," I said to him, "Don't play the game, Jug."  
"I won't." He said, "I promise."  
"Good."  
-  
"He's in here." The guard said, unlocking a door. "Andrews you have a visitor."  
"Vera?"  
"Shut up and listen, Archie." I said, "You need to exactly as I say."  
"What are you talking about?" He said.  
"Archie." I sighed, "Look, JD got me and Heather into some hot water and now I'm stuck here until I convince you to accept getting tapped or whatever. So just accept it."  
Archie sighed, "But Mad Dog said..."  
"I don't give a fuck what Mad Dog said or who he is. Listen very carefully: JD is dangerous. His father is Hiram Lodge's brother. We were playing this game and we- Heather got..."  
"What the hell happened to Heather?" Archie asked growing concerned.  
"Poison." I said, "But she's dead now, okay. I just need you to help me out here so I won't get framed for her poisoning. Okay? So accept getting tapped Archie. Because if I go to jail Jughead will have Joaquin and the Serpents slaughter you."  
Archie said, "I'll do it. For you, Veron..."  
"Woah there, Red. No one ever calls me Veronica. I'm not going soft now." I said, "Tell them what you said." The guard opened the door.  
"I accept." He said.  
"Be safe, Archie." I said, "And please don't get yourself killed. I don't want your blood on my hands."  
After that whole debacle I had to meet the Warden which was weird.   
"Veronica Sawyer. I'm Warden Norton."   
"Good to meet you Warden even though I should be in school. Truancy is a crime you know?" I said.  
The Warden cleared his throat, "Veronica, your mother told us about your recent struggles with falling into the wrong crowd and we just want to help you... Betty Cooper and Veronica Lodge are not..."  
"They're my best friends. My mother is delusional. There's nothing else to say to convince me to drop them."  
"How about this?" The Warden placed an envelope on the desk, "Open it."  
Inside the folder was a bunch of what looked like new Blue and Gold files all with the headline:  
"Fun and Games or Murder?"  
"What the fuck is this?" I gasped, "Betty would never. They'd never."  
He handed me a box, "This belonged to Mr. Andrews." Inside was a silver anklet with my name engraved on it. However, inside the locket was a drop of blood.  
"Oh my god. Our pact. Where did you get these?" I said, "I'm gonna go. Thank you for your time."  
I dialed Jughead, "Meet me at Pop's. Alone."  
-


End file.
